The Theory of What If

(30 Days Writing Challenge)
Day Eleven: Something You Always Think "What If" About

Image: Pinterest

Well, yes. I'm back with this challenge! It has turned from thirty days writing challenge to hundredth, but nevertheless yes I'm doing this again! Summing this up, Jesica is now on her day sixteen, and that's a pretty big gap to catch up, and I realise I can't really write daily, so I decide that I will write as much as I want whenever I get the chance! (Now, by the way, is that chance.)

I have a lot of What Ifs, honestly. Too much that I can't decide on one. Choices are what humans bond to make in their journey called life, so I think the What Ifs have grown daily on a such continuous basis. After a long and exhausting research with tremendous respondents and various scales based on Professors of Time and Decision (a long Tumblr surf and Lang Leav really), I come up with these axioms:

1. What Ifs are bond to be better than the reality, and
2. we forget there are better things reality corresponds, more or less adequately, to the what ifs.

On academic life. I often question my chosen major, and it is Management. When deciding, I have a lot of fears and basically stupid considerations involving who would be my friends and how much it would change my life drastically. I took too much pleasure of my comfort zone that I was late in realising that if I didn't change, the zone would. I solemnly chose my major purely for friends-related reason, and the first years have been hellish for me. So yes, what ifs. What if I was not that naive, stupid, awkward girl and instead chose the major I honestly want to undergo.

Things would be better, I would have a lot of new friends with similar interests and I would be one step ahead in reaching my dreams. 

That could be right. Seriously, there are a really big chance that it would be right. See? Axiom number one: What ifs are bond to be better than the reality. I can finish the story here, and the moral lesson would be great enough. We forget, don't we? We forget that now, well, I have plenty new friends too and a short number of them turns to be ones I keep close dearly. I might not study writing, communication, or anything related in specific, but I got the chance to have an internship in an advertising company I always want to be. In addition, I get to start my own start-up business, and basically spending more time in the city of Bandung I always love before getting a job strikes and Jakarta living happens.

In accordance, I still lost many things because of the What Ifs, but I also get many things because of the thing I chose. Thinking about this, I reflect about how He has made everything right in its time. It is weird to state, but I believe that naive, stupid, awkward decision is a part of God's plan to place me here. I haven't quite understood why. And all this is only my try-to-be-wise persona speaking, because I question Him a lot too, but I have the faith.

Well, faith moves mountain after all, remember? Why bother wonder what ifs?

x, Michelle